“I wish he was more romantic.” That’s a complaint that virtually every woman has had in her relationship at some point. Some women, typically someone we know, is the lucky one. She’s the one with the man who is Mr. Romantic. He does things that make us gasp in delight and we wish so much that our guy had just a fraction of that degree of romance within him. Sadly, most men just stumble when it comes to romance. They don’t know how to connect those dots. We’re then forced to settle for a lovely relationship that isn’t quite as fulfilling as we’d wish. You don’t have to settle though. You can actually subtly guide your man towards being much more romantic so that every day feels like Valentine’s Day to you.
What Won’t Make Him More Romantic
We all secretly think that we know exactly what to do to get our man to respond in a specific way. The problem is that we really don’t have a clue. This is particularly true when it comes to romance. To avoid making anymore of those unwitting mistakes, here’s a list of things you want to avoid doing if you’re hoping to get your man to turn on the romance:
Make him feel guilty for not being romantic. When you attempt to make a man feel guilty for not being romantic, you’re in essence wasting your breath, your energy and your time. Women indulge in all types of strategies in an attempt to make their man feel guilty for not being more romantic. Things like crying when he doesn’t bring flowers after an argument, pouting when he forgets to pick up a birthday cake for you or using the silent treatment if your holiday gift is a blender. Men don’t tune into this type of guilty ploy. He’ll be oblivious to it, which in turn will just frustrate you more.
Compare him to a man who is romantic. If your last boyfriend was romantic, keep that information to yourself. Don’t share it with the man you’re in love with now. He’s not going to hear the part about how your last guy was so romantic, he’s only going to hone in on the “my last boyfriend” part of the snippet. He’ll be jealous, hurt and angry and your plan will go up in smoke.
What Will Make Him More Romantic
If you wish he was more romantic, you have to take control if you want to make it happen. Men don’t suddenly decide that today is the day they are going to be romantic. If he hasn’t been up to this point, you need to be his guide into the world of romance. Here are a few things you can do to encourage him to be more romantic:
Be romantic yourself. Men will often mirror the behavior of the woman they’re involved with. If you want him to write you a love letter from the heart, do that for him. Put real effort into it and write down everything you feel for him. He’ll be touched and he’ll want to return the gesture. You can do this with many things. There’s absolutely no rule that says that a woman can’t buy a man flowers. If you do occasionally, he’ll soon take the hint that you want him to do the same for you.
Tell him directly what gifts you want. If there is a gift giving occasion approaching, tell your man directly what you’d like him to get for you. If you hope that he’ll be able to anticipate that you want diamond earrings, don’t be shocked if you get a gift certificate for a clothing store. Men aren’t good at reading the minds of the woman they love. If you don’t want to be disappointed, be direct. In time, he’ll begin to see a pattern in what you like and then he’ll be able to purchase something on his own that you’ll love.
Compliment him when he is romantic. A man’s definition of romance often greatly differs from a woman. He may take your car to fuel it up if he sees its running on empty. That’s romantic to a man. That’s why it’s essential that you thank him for things like that. Those gestures are meant to make you smile and make your life easier, so always thank him. If you do that, he’ll know you truly appreciate him and it will push him to want to do even more for you.
You can have the romantic connection you desire but it’s all about helping your guy to find his inner romantic triggers. Every woman can have a relationship in which romance is always present. Once you discover the psychological buttons to push within your man to make him crave romance as much as you do, your connection with him will never be the same again.
About Author: Gillian Reynolds has experienced her share of broken hearts and relationship issues. She’s now a happily married mother of two who enjoys sharing her wisdom with others. When she’s not handing out relationship advice she spends her time as an enthusiastic professional party planner and part time match maker. Gillian welcomes the opportunity to share her insight in the form of guest blog posts. If you’d like her to write a relationship article for your newsletter, website or blog, get in touch. She’s always happy to help women and men find the fulfillment they desire in their romantic connections.